How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Brown

We are still introducing ourselves to you, internets, and there are one or two things that I have kept hidden from you. One is that I am FULL of fashion related neuroses. Irene has had to listen to me rant about the many things that irritate me, many times. So I figured that it is now your turn.

My number one fashion neurosis is that I don’t wear brown. At all. Ever. Don’t get me wrong – I like brown. I’m okay with it.  But I don’t wear it. Part of this is because I hate wearing brown and black together, and if I have brown boots then I can’t have a black coat. Or if I have a brown coat, then I can’t have a black bag. So I don’t own brown shoes. Or brown bags. Or brown coats. And because I don’t own brown shoes or bags or coats, I don’t own brown shirts. Because you can’t wear a brown shirt with black or grey shoes, right?

Now before we move to the next part of this particular story, you have to know this about me – I have very muscular calves. It is very hard to find boots that fit me. So hard that I have left shoe stores in tears because none of the boots fit me.

So anyway, last spring I was shopping at Winners and I found this pair of beautiful cowboy-inspired, made in Spain, leather boots that were originally $400, on clearance for $120.  AND THEY FIT ME. The colour was described as a tobacco smoke, which is kind of greyish brown. In Winners, they looked more grey than brown. I fell in love, called my Mother to get her encouragement and blessing (she is my enabler and I love her for it) and then bought them. And because it was late April, promptly put them away.

And now here we are, suddenly,  in October. It got cold this weekend! I dug my beautiful Spanish leather boots out yesterday and today I’ve been trying them on with different outfits.

And my dear dear readers, there is a problem. A huge problem. Those boots ain’t grey. They aren’t even CLOSE to grey. You know what colour they are? A beautiful fawnish light brown. They have little black patches too. They remind me of a deer.

See? Deer.

And I love the boots.

BUT THEY ARE @!#!#@#!!!!!@!! BROWN.

You know what, though? I don’t care. I love them. I am giving up this particular fashion ghost. And while I don’t think I will wear a grey shirt with brown shoes (really, come on, that’s just gross.  I have some self-respect you know!), I think I will be okay with wearing these boots with my black coats. You know how it goes…Step by Step!

And please, comment and let me know YOUR fashion neuroses are. Just so I don’t feel so neurotic and alone!


11 responses to “How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Brown

  1. hmm…none come to mind that are very recent. but I completely refused that goucho pants trend that was (bizarrely) all the rage about 6 years ago. I still have nightmares about all of the insane camel toes from goucho pants that paraded around my high school…

    • stephaniegal

      Ohh yeah – were they like jersey fabric? I remember those. So hideous. I always wondered why those gals didn’t just wear a skirt.

  2. Archivist

    Spandex. Yoga wear outside the yoga studio. UGGS.

    • stephaniegal

      I’m guilty of yoga pants outside the studio. Sometimes I take the train in them. I need to be comfortable for 4 hours!

      I’m conflicted on uggs…they look so warm. I am always cold, so I like warmth.

  3. Lisa

    That’s the best blog post title I have seen on the internet is a while. High five!

    As for fashion, don’t get me started on UGGS. I hate them with the power of a thousand suns. Personally, I won’t do neon colours (does anyone look good in neon yellow, really) or velour. But most normal people wouldn’t either. Something I see a lot of people look good in, but just make happen for myself? Floral prints. Can’t do it. Ever.

    • stephaniegal

      And that is cool. Florals aren’t for everyone. There are a lot of really hideous floral prints in stores right now, too! I was wearing floral cords as a five year old, not sure I want to revisit that trend!

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  5. jane

    I hate that nasty spandex material that is usually used for clubbing shirts & dresses. The type that clings to everything it shouldn’t cling to. And then sometimes you think you’ve found a nice top at a store, but when you go to touch it you realize it’s that slippery material and pull your hand back in disgust.

    Yes, I have very strong feelings towards that material.

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